My constant struggle to influence change

It’s been said that the time it takes the creator of an idea to learn to verbalize the idea in an acceptable way is the time it takes for the idea to take hold.

It took 45 years between the invention of the telephone and its regular use. Imagine choosing  Morse Code instead of the telephone.

Bill Gates did not understand the power of the web, and it took 10 years before Microsoft got involved.

What is the thread here? People don’t like change, regardless of whether or not it will be in their best interests. And the time it takes for folks to know how to change in a way that contains the disruption is the length of the change cycle.

That said, I’m exhausted trying to help the sales field change.

As the creator of a new idea, I’ve spent 23 years of my life, attempting to get it accepted. My goal has always been to offer the world a way to serve by helping each other discover their own answers. I’ve started with the field of sales (‘why sales’  is a different conversation): through Buying Facilitation® I’m able to give sellers a new tool kit (based on change management)  to help buyers manage their buying  path easily and with a minimum of disruption.

We have consistently gotten approximately 800% increase over using conventional sales alone. And yet I still have to fight the entire field, daily: they just adore doing it their way. They even get paid well for merely closing 7%!


Today I got a lovely note from a man who had recently read Dirty Little Secrets. He explained how he tried to get folks to read the book, gave his senior folks some of my blog posts, and still couldn’t get them to even consider having the team read the book, let alone learn the material.

This is beyond frustrating. I have been spouting this brilliance for decades. And I’ve developed myriad ways for folks to learn or use the material. I’m getting to the point where it seems pointless.

The Book: Dirty Little Secrets, more than any of my other books, finally and conclusively, explains the differences between how buyers buy and how the sales model sells, and explains all that must happen in a buying decision that sales is not addressing.

The Model: Buying Facilitation® doesn’t compete with sales. It’s an add on that truly, truly, helps buyers manage their buying decisions. It teaches them how to make their own best decisions, bring together all of the right people at the right time, how to choose their best solutions (with their own criteria), and get everyone on board quickly and effortlessly. Everyone knows the sales model merely manages the solution placement end, and doesn’t address the off-line decision path. Why are folks not eager to learn?

A patent: I’ve recently developed a lead gen capability to truly follow buyers as they navigate down their decision path. And I’m having to search vigorously for folks to trial it. Really? Their current capability offers nothing but guesswork and less than 1% closing rates.

And I’m fighting with folks daily. Really?? For decades? With glorious testimonials, referrals, references, speaking engagements, webinars, articles, books, patents…. And we are still fighting?

I don’t have enough years left, or patience, or guts. It hurts daily. I just wish it were easier. I wish I didn’t have to struggle. I know I complain about this frequently. It’s so fabulous to know there is a place I can complain and get heard by someone other than my poor friends. Thanks for hearing.


Read the book: Dirty Little Secrets: why buyers can’t buy and sellers can’t sell and what to do about it.

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2 thoughts on “My constant struggle to influence change”

  1. Sharon: If you haven’t read him already, it may cheer you up to read some of the work of (psychology) Professor John Jost at NYU, who came up with the concept of Systems Justifications Theory in 1994. His writings&research deal largely with why people and groups justify and rationalize support for the status quo and resist change, even when to do so is against their best interests. His website is

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